May 23

Four Common Communication Breakdowns Faced By Managers And How To Fix them

If you are a manager, it’s likely you spend most of your day in meetings or communicating with employees and co-workers (verbally/email/text), which provides lots of opportunities for communication breakdowns.  Here are a few common communication pitfalls for you to consider so you can stop them before they happen.

Breakdown #1: Assuming You Know

An old saying that holds true today is “when you assume you make an ASS out of U and ME.”  If you’re making assumptions about your employees, what they are thinking and how they are feeling without asking them specifically, you are guessing and chances are you’re wrong.  You stop being curious when you assume you already know what your team is thinking or is about to say. 

Even if you are a manager with a high degree of emotional intelligence and good relationships with your team members, whatever you assume comes from your perspective which is (unintentionally) clouded by many factors including your behavior, experience, gender, upbringing, and financial situation to name a few.  It’s impossible for you to to know with 100% certainty the perspective of the people who work with you. Making assumptions stops communication and hurts relationships.

Solution: ASK!! The easiest way to stop this communication breakdown is to ASK!  Be genuinely curious.  Make a list of questions that allow you to go deeper and get more information from your team.  Some questions might include:

• What about that (suggestion, idea, change) is important to you?
• How would you approach this challenge?
• If you were me, what would you do in this situation?

Asking doesn’t come naturally to most people, so consider practicing by creating five open-ended questions every morning.  People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care and the most powerful way to show people you care is by asking them really great questions.

Breakdown #2: Unspoken Expectations

Disappointment is created when there’s a gap between what you expect and what you experience as your reality.  If you are like most of us, your expectations are not communicated with others, and as a result, your frustration and distrust snowballs over time.

Additionally, managers often have high expectations for themselves and assume employees will have those same expectations of themselves. Remember, assuming by itself breaks down communication (see above), add to it unspoken expectations and it’s easy to see why communication fails so often.

Solution: Clearly define expectations in writing.The benefit of writing your expectations is twofold:  

#1 it gives you the chance to get specific. Often expectations are general and therefore not achievable.  For example: a general statement would be “I expect the team to work hard.” What does that mean to you?  How will you know if they are working hard?  What are the ways you monitor and measure hard work?  A more specific statement would be:  “I expect the team to work smart, increasing project efficiency by 10% and increasing profits by 10% as a result of the new efficiency.”

#2 It prevents the expectation from being a moving target.  It is common for high achievers to create a goal in their head, and when they get close to achieving it, to change the goal. Putting your expectations in writing makes you and others accountable for achieving the goal as it was written.  It also provides the great opportunity to celebrate together when you reach it.

Breakdown #3: Focus on Agreement 

We are taught agreement is good. Although it can feel good in the moment, it’s often at the cost of honest communication and innovative thinking.  It is natural for people to want to fit in, be liked and in many cases, avoid confrontation.  The problem is the desire for agreement prevents people from opening up and actually shuts down communication.

Obviously, decisions need to be made–but that doesn’t mean everyone has to agree. Equally important, disagreement doesn’t have to be confrontational; in fact, confrontation only exists when someone brings it to the conversation.  Open and honest communication is lost when agreement is the primary goal.

Solution: Leave space for disagreement. What does it take for your organization to welcome disagreement?  If you are managing people at any level, this is the most important question to ask yourself.  Leaving space for disagreement welcomes conversation, allows people to feel safe opening up, making mistakes, and sharing ideas.

If you aren’t ready for that bold a question consider, “what is the cost of agreement?” Since most people avoid confrontation, and disagreement feels like confrontation, who around the table isn’t speaking up, isn’t sharing their truth, isn’t offering their ideas?  Successful communication is about EXCHANGING information–and that doesn’t happen if people are silent for the sake of agreement.

Breakdown #4: Global Thinking

Although thinking globally in terms of marketing and business building can be a benefit, using global language is a huge detriment.  For example words like “everyone”, “everything”, “always”, “nothing”, “no one” and “never” are example of global statements.  The minute we use global language, it shuts down our brain (and the brain of everyone else around the table.)  If beliefs are so strong they are true in a global sense, then there is no reason for your team to get curious and explore alternatives.

Your brain naturally chooses the path of least resistance. Global language allows us to reduce options so it’s easy for others to hop on the bandwagon and agree with minimal thought or consideration, thereby decreasing communication almost before it begins.

Solution: Is it true?

We can’t control the first thought that comes in our mind, but we can control all those that come after.  So, if it’s natural for you to think globally, allow those thoughts to flow, and then question yourself.  Ask, “Is it true for everyone?” “Is there no other option in the universe?” (NOTE:  You don’t have to like the other options in order for them to exist.  Remember the goal is to enhance communication not shut it down.) Even consider making it a practice to question your own global assumptions as a means to start conversation and get people thinking.

Becoming aware of these four common communication breakdowns and implementing the solutions will put you and your team on the path of better work relationships, more productivity, and a healthier, more honest work culture.

Laura Treonze, serves as Chief Life Strategist with LMT Consulting, which helps executives and teams create massive success through self-awareness. Her life-changing approach has transformed individuals and families and has redefined the way non-profits and corporations “do” business.