Mar 17

I Really Like You

Have you ever had a time when you met someone and instantly knew you liked him or her?  This feeling of connection with another person happens when there is rapport.  Rapport is the harmonious association with a person or group of people where there is sharing of particular behaviors.

There are 3 key components to establishing rapport:

• 7% Words – common experience, content chunks and key words
• 38% Tonality – voice, tempo, volume, pitch, and tonality
• 55% Physiology– breathing, gestures, posture and movements

Mirroring and matching other people’s behaviors is the fastest way to establish rapport.  Some examples include: touching your face when they touch theirs, adjusting your tone of voice to match their tone or slowing the cadence of your words to mirror their pace.

Often people say they aren’t comfortable “copying” someone else’s behavior and yet most of us do it unconsciously every time we see a baby. You bend over the carriage or high chair, talk softly and make goofy sounds – googoo and gaga. Why do you do that?  To make the baby comfortable so s/he doesn’t cry.

It’s the same with adults, although we don’t expect to see them cry, mirroring and matching is a way to create comfort between people.  After all people want to spend time with people they know like and trust.  When there is rapport there is an immediate sense of oneness and trust.

About the Author

Laura Treonze serves as Chief Life Strategist at her consulting firm, LMT Consulting which helps executives and teams create massive success through self-awareness.  Treonze is a national speaker and has been published in “Living the Law of Attraction” and WIN: 35 Winning Strategies from Today’s Leading Entrepreneurs.” Laura has also served as a peak performance coach for one of the world’s leading self-development gurus. She received her Bachelors of Arts in Political Science/Mass Communication and Journalism from Stonehill College.