Nov 24

Tips for Making Feedback Work

Even the most experienced manager can feel nervous when preparing to give an employee constructive feedback.  These ten tips will help you prepare when giving feedback.

1. Prepare – do your homework.  Feedback should not be a spontaneous event.  Get the facts. Nothing destroys trust faster than unfairly criticizing someone.

1. Have empathy for the person receiving the feedback.  No one likes to hear they’ve failed in some way.  Changing behavior can be difficult, especially if you’re asking them to take a look at an ingrained way of behaving.  

1. Be direct.  Don’t sugar-coat negative feedback – If you aren’t direct, your employee may leave confused about what you were trying to say.

1. Make it a two-way conversation and stay open.  Don’t mistake valid reasons for excuses – listen to your employee’s explanations about the situation.

1. Make sure positive feedback outweighs negative by a ratio of 5:1.  Even valid suggestions may be heard as criticisms. Catch them doing something right five times more often than pointing out what needs to be fixed.

1. “I” versus “You”:  Start with “I observed …” versus “You did…” This leaves the door open for additional information and sounds less confrontational and finite.

1. Avoid absolutes:  Do not use words like “always” or “never.” If you generalize, your employee will find one example and use it as an excuse to discount the message.

1. Start by describing the behavior versus the impact.  It is easier to hear about behavior first because it is hard to refute the facts.  If you start with the impact, it may put them on the defensive.  

1. Follow-up:  Checking in reinforces the positive behavior or continues to correct the problem behavior.

1. If you’re upset – wait:  If you give feedback when you are upset, the receiver will feel judged and become defensive and likely tune you out.  If your emotions are not under control, you may say something you will regret later.

Ken Blanchard said that feedback is the breakfast of champions.  Feedback reinforces the behaviors you want, helps align expectations and priorities, alleviates the fear of the unknown, and lets people know how they can improve their performance.  It is important to focus on what they did, the impact of their actions, and most importantly, what they can do better going forward.  When feedback is focused on future behavior, it is so much easier for both the giver and the receiver of feedback.